Thursday, June 16, 2011

AIP Triggered By... The "Energizer Bunny" on "Crack Cocaine"

Part 1

It is not quite one week into "Summer Vacation" for my family...

-Twin 8 year old adoptive sons, with Reactive Attachment Disorder(RAD), Anxiety & Attention Deficit Hyper-Activity Disorder (ADHD)...

-Husband (School Teacher, also off for the summer), with ADHD...

The "Raw Energy" that exudes from these three individuals could power a large city!

The energy is delivered in a variety of formats...
-fun-loving playfulness
-outdoor enthusiasm
-sports participation
-multiple partially-completed home renovation projects
-behavioral rages & fits
-fabricating untruthful stories
-blatent disrespect
-unkind remarks
-constant LOUD voices
-self-focused, lack of empathy for others
-irrational thought processes
-multiple, simutaneous, stimulating, sensory imputs (TVs, Radios, Computers, Video Games, Conversation, etc.)
-never ending supply of "High Gear" energy in motion (good & bad)

Part 2

Pair this trio with a wife/mother ...a Thyroid that runs low... and an extra large genetic helping of Acute Intermittent Porphyria...
Not a pretty sight! Believe me...
I am dog tired most of the time and now that everyone is home for the summer I get very little rest time.
During the school year I work part-time....this allows me several days to rest while everyone is in school... I still have to manage the home...doctors appointments and food shopping... but I have a balance that I am able to manage most of the time.

Today I feel overwhelmed and hopeless... Porphyria has been "on my heels" for a few days now... I am anxious about my escalating symptoms... I had to work today... my cognative recall is slipping even with basic concepts....eye /light pain...headaches...leg pain...nausea... emotional instability... restlessness... irritability...

I can usually "calm the beast" by removing sensory stimulants...resting... increased carbohydrate intake... and more rest... BUT... did you read Part 1???

Part 3

I don't know how to best cope... I am run down, tired out, and over stressed... I try to see the light at the end of the tunnel... but today I cannot.
Others I reach out to are unfamiliar with the dynamics that complete our home...
They politely listen as I vent... this helps some.

I pray...I eat right... I exercise daily (when I am well enough)... I pray some more... I try to live a lifestyle of healthy choices...of love... of kindness and respect... I have sought professional intervention for my family... counselors... psychologists... medication... physicians... specialists... religion/faith/spirituality... I try very very hard to be positive in effectively managing my Health Situation but today...
today I am struggling...
today I am discouraged...
today I feel hopeless...
today my body hurts, I am physically, emotionally and cognitively uncomfortable
today I can't think straight or recall common words or processes
today I wish I were stronger in every way
today I am angry with my family for "triggering my Porphyria" with their issues
today I am angry with myself for being weak
Today I wish Porphyria would go away!
Today I really HATE Porphyria... I am tired of this same old cycle!!!

1 comment:

G-Mas said...

"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important that facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill. It will make or break a company . . . a church . . . a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day, We cannot change our past . . . we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way, We cannot change the inevitable, The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude . . . I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.”

- Charles Swindoll
I pray that you always keep your good attitude MFD! ILY!